Tuesday, December 30, 2008

2008-2009

我开始写这篇entries的时候已经12.45a.m 了。还有一天,2008年就过去了。

该怎么说,今年还真是多事之秋啊。发生了很多事,是我远远无法预料到的。一直在寻求自我定义,一直在自我摸索中迷失,也一直在失落中无奈悲伤。

我想,我们都必须学会成长。我有一个朋友在msn的pm上写着: ‘学习妥协是成长必经的过程’。说得很贴切的我觉得,生命从来都不会在你想要起飞时给你对的风,而羽翼的强度也不能堪受风的强度。当一切发生的不是自己所想要的,所渴望的,就会在现实与梦想中形成断层,然后就会觉得很失落。可是没有人能改变生命中发生的事情,所以最后都只能去接受,并妥协。但是笑着接受很重要啊。生命中一定还有许多美好的事物与惊喜的。我如此的相信着。

呃,说得远了。明天过后就是2009年了。只能说,希望2009年不会再像2008年。

我渴望生命的阳光。我想,我是可以期许2009年的吧。

然后,想说的是,谢谢所有的朋友,特别是一些于我很重要的朋友。你们在我心中留下不可磨灭的足迹。

啊然后就,所有朋友一起加油吧。

嗯,还有慧芝,加油啊。深深的祝福你。 =)

嗯啊。

我是个白痴。

到底在奢望些什么?

从新来过的,美好的时光?

一些美好的关怀?

一段感情?

让梦中的梦想/渴望成真?

他妈的,我就是个白痴。

够了。那不是你现实中的____。

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to everyone =)

Have fun n enjoy ur day =)

Byebye.

Monday, December 22, 2008

cant slp.

Its 1.54 ady when i start to write dis post n i still don feel lyk slping.So hmm,hw everyone's life going?

Well,reali nth much to say.jus hols is pretty boring.Sch is going to reopen soon.Bt next yr is SPM year,will b stressful i think?

N hmm ystd is a bad day.i completely n clearly kno det i sux.Thx.Ow however,im starting to work on my facebook ady though i registered it on October.Bt the work i meaning is jus add a profile photo,den add ppl,den dets all.lol.

So hmm hope 2mr wont be too bad.ow n im going to get my salary 2mr.joe n kd,lets enjoy our meal 2mr.

gudnite.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

movie movie

Hmm so again,im gonna say,its long since i last update my blog.hmm din reali hav e mood to update?or shud i say cos no ppl will b viewing my blog lol.anything la.

So watched 3 movie recently:

1.The Day The Earth Stood Stil

So hmm The day the earth stood still,seriously,for me,itdon reali nice.A movie without story,a strory without content.The whole movie is trying to spread some messages,or lessons,which is protect our earth,or it will b too late for us to regret when disaster happen.It is a gud theme,seriously,bt too bad it is in Hollywood style,det make me feel lyk dis movie is jus shoot to earn money.Well it is something lyk The Day after Tomorrow,bt for me The day after Tomorrow is no doubt much more betta den The Day the Earth Stood Still.
We can change!

2.Yes Man
Ow men,dis movie is nice.Reali nice.Though it jus a comedy movie,det ppl jus intend to spend RM10 to buy some laughter,bt i must say,it is one of e best comedy movie i watched.N it is more den jus a comedy movie,det reali out of my prediction.Haven watch it?den,watch it NOW!
HEY MAN,SAY YES TO UR LIFE!

3.Ip Man
A story of grand master of Wing Chun style Kung Fu.hmm wad else can i say,its a nice movie.Watch it.lol.
Wing Chun,Ip Man!

Hmm i was lyk toking abt movie only,cos i did nth special in hols except keep watching movie lol.(though watch movie oso nt special la =.=).
So sch is going to reopen ady.next yr sure will b v tiring n stressful.argh.

P.S:And joe ur jus too damn lucky la ROAR!i wan work oso laaaa.

Dets all.byebye n gudnite.

Monday, December 15, 2008

嗯。

今天心情很不好啊。最近都一直这样。

晚上翻来覆去就是睡不着。真的应该试试安眠药。

心中的那个洞,干,它越来越大。

我的失落,会不会是以后的失望?

突然好想哭。

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

updated.

Hmm its been long since i last update my blog(i keep repeating dis sentence,am i? =X).

Ooookayy firstly i finish my first short-term job in e hols,n det i no nid to slp late everynite n wake up early everyday to go work.i can enjoy hugging my bolster n kissing my pillow(okay im jus joking lol),n let e heat of sun burn my _____ (fill in e blank urself.lol).So still don kno weder is dey other short-term job det coming.hope det i gt la,im short of money T.T

N hmm kinda alot of things happened.hope det everything will b fine ba.n oww thx God det i can go for e bbq.though sum ppl say it quite boring,bt hmm for me it still quite okay la.n e bbq fish is nice.n e sky det night is nice.e my mood det night is _______.

如果明天不是你的语言,
就让失语成为往后的,所谓的,
青春纪事。

So gudnite ppl.my bed miss me,so am i.lol.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

GOT TITTE

Woa its been long since i last updated my blog.okay i went KL from 20-23 wif ding.Went dey to watch SMM dota tournament.sad,Ks lose,due to sum fuking(forgive me for e badwords)action of team eVo`XTC which dey against on d loser semi final bracket.dey can act move on to final n eventually to grand final.GRRRR!

Hmm den started to work ystd.okay e work is lyk quite boring n tiring at d same time.when dey is customer,it is tiring,when dey is no customer,its pretty boring.2mr gotta work 12hours,from 12pm-12am.okay its tiring =.=

Ow n hope det i can go for e bbq thingy.nt reali sure though.argh i wan go!

N hmm my result is bad.haiz..

bye.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Yea dets it

DO u reali enjoy ur life?

DO u reali appreciate wad u hav?



i hope i can slp tonite =X

Monday, November 17, 2008

post.

1.34 now(when im starting to type dis post) n i still haven slp.Oasis song is accompanying me.OASIS ROCKS!.one of e greatest band ROAR!

Ow man hols life hols life has been dull n boring.everyday slp around 2++am den wake up 1++pm.Lol bt its kinda nice oso la,no nid to worry for homework(though i HARDLY do it when im stil in sch =x),no nid to worry scold by teacher or kena disipline(ey man i hate to sign on disipline book or kad merah),no nid to worry for all e exam thing(ow my sis STPM start 2mr,all e best to her).AND AND AND GAMES NON-STOP.too bad i don hav enuff money to buy too much books n dvds =(

Oh btw,today went CS wif fren.i went CS for more den 5times in dis two weeks d =.= .n we watched Quantum Of Solace(ohhhh finally) n Daniel Craig rox.some say dis series of 007 not nice as James Bond don't flirt wif gal n being humour lyk he usually do n deys been too much revenge n hateness element in dis episode.bt okay seriously for me its stil quite nice(though when comparing it wif all e previous classic 007 film it still not gud).anyway,Daniel Craig ROAR!

okay its getting late n i hav to go on bed ady.gudnite.

Cos all of the stars
are fading away,
just try not to worry,
you'll see dem somedays
Oasis-Stop crying your heart out


i hope dey do,lyk wad the song lyrics say. =X

给我音乐

我不想,为这一切,去背负如此难受的落寞。

我不想,为这一切,去让我日后回首青春时只有轻轻的叹息,和很多很多跌落的梦。

我不想,为这一切,将我想要的笑容换成呐喊与控诉。

我不是谁,我不是你,我不是他。我没有你有的生活模式,我没有你有的从容,我没有你有的恣意。

我不明白的,也许你不需要去明白(那是我所羡慕的)。

而我的故事,是你也不会想要去关心的。这一切,都只是对自己的独白。

啊所以,给我音乐。或许那是最轻柔的低语。

啊,我无法自弹自唱。我不会弹吉他。他妈的。

Saturday, November 15, 2008

海角七号




刚刚看了《海角七号》(终于啊啊啊)。很好看的一部电影。而我总是在看完电影后有很多很多的感触,然后有很多很多的梦想重新燃起,然后又重新有很多很多的失望。

对于梦想的执著,我一直认为不只是一种口头上的坚定,更多在于去实行,去争取,去战斗。可是在梦想的背后还是会有很多很多的阻力。很感慨的是,生命永远不会在你想要冲刺的地方给你平滑的跑道,不会在你想要飞翔的时候给你对的风,不会在你想要呐喊的时候给你真实的安慰。然后当你不想跑了,跑道却已筑好,当你不想飞了,风却刚起,当你不想呐喊了,却给了你实在的踏实。虽然如此,我想我还是相信梦想的。而我的梦,却在哪个时间点上等候我的期许?

我很幸运,也很不幸运。

嗯,还有,在电影里,爱依然如此美好,如此静好。生命中的感动,或许时刻都在左右,不经意的牵动着心扉,却又是生命里最实在的执著与眷恋。对于电影与人生里的爱,我不知道该如何用文字去描写。只能说,爱是最美好的事。

爱与梦,许如你(我)的天,和地。不会动摇的执著。

Thursday, November 13, 2008

没有粗话(如果你相信)

失望是弦,你的眼神就是破碎的注解。

的妈他。

奈无。

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

没有题目

我很难受,真的很难受

该拿什么来填补,心中那个缺口的洞?

又该拿什么来逆流悲伤?

我是个烂人。

原谅我的懦弱。

=)

Friday, November 7, 2008

blah.

ahhhh so damn happy nw.finally exam is going to over,left physics paper 1 n 3.den everything thing det related to study will come to an end,an END(at least for dis yr laa).okay so e whole exam is v tiring.sth lyk u come bac from sch,bath,den rest a while,den start study lyk crazy,den slp.den wake up at midnite n study.den exam.den e whole process repeat again on 2nd day.lol okay i admit det its my fault laaaa.din study much before exam.blah.don care la..

n hols is coming!gotta do alot of thing in hols if im able to.oh n Barack Obama won!lala e next president of America n hope det he will really make a change.

so dets all.

lets hav fun.in HOLIDAYS. =)

Thursday, October 30, 2008

明白了什么?

这几天又发生了很多事情,然后,疲惫感是肯定会有的。

嗯,我或许对所谓的生命的宽度有那么一点点的了解了..有时,悲伤不是绝对,或许前方的空气很清新,或许阳光很温暖,或许笑容和快乐很恣意。可是,到最后还只是或许,不太可能成为现实的或许,可是,白日梦与渴望的心情是不用钱的。在某种程度上,这些轻盈的梦,在在的填补了我心中的那个缺口,虽然我知道,向往的那一片天不是我的天空的颜色,而希望到最终也没有成真。可是,愿意相信,也许就是一种幸福。

然后想说的是,虽然以希望的颜色来彩绘这一片天空,可是他妈的天空还是一样的挂着深沉的色彩,心情还是一样的低落。到最后,或许我会明白,希望与悲痛是不能等价交换的。

嗯,就是这样,又是一篇低沉的自白。

Thursday, October 16, 2008

random

在夜里,是要掬一把泪的。
意象式的对生命的致敬。

而那未完成的以后,
或许会在更夜的瞳孔里实现。

鞠躬,
在无雨的天界里。

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

argh.

okay all these days r damn bad.n depressed as well.n im getting more n more tired to all of dis.

okay so lets runaway.

or

show me e way out of all of dis.

=x

Monday, October 13, 2008

study?!

woa i so damn long nvr update blog ady..everyday jus online surf web ply game..okay so things to do in list is

1.study
2.force myself to study
3.off e com n go to study
4.persuade myself to study
5.giv up after i fail to do things in 1,2,3,4

seriously i die ady.all ppl lyk study so damn lot ady bt i stil study det few pages only n wif moral project undone n UNTOUCH. argh.

okay im gonna do damn bad in dis final exam. =(

Thursday, October 2, 2008

飞,飞?

为什么,永远都是一样的生活,一样的精神折磨,一样的疲惫。

受够了。

给我一双翅膀,让我飞离这座城。

Tuesday, September 30, 2008


Holidays was boring. =( only e time when ply games(DotA!) is fun lol.ystd went CS watch moive wif Joe.Accuracy of Death a.k.a Sweet Rain.Movie is jus too damn nice.n its v touching n meaningful.the shinigami (death god) in e moive,Chiba is a shinigami det hav nvr seen sunny day before.hmm i betta don say here,later u all lost e interest to e moive lol.

Sunny day is not special,but its important.so is death. ---Accuracy of Death

enjoy e moive =)

Saturday, September 27, 2008

the happening(???)

okay so many things happened in dis few days.will jus list out.

1.frog!okay we disect frog.den teacher say for knowledge its okay det we kil e frog n take everything out(organ) from its body!(dosa tau..).too bad i don hav e photo here.can view tan's blog for e photo though he is nt same group wif me.lol.bt all e frog is almost e same la except det tan's group frog is female bt too bad i cant find e male reproductive organ(lol im trying to don use foul language?) of my group male frog.den e heart of frog stil beating act after his body is disect n some of its organ has been cut off.bt my sis told me det act e frog died when e choroform is applied on it.okay hope so.so det it wont suffer so much.

2.julia's bday!its awesome.n owww man julia ur house is jus toooo big.okay dets lotsa food dey.den karaoke time!lol e mv is nt for child man.n haha i keep gay-ing wif gid n he co-operate so much in dis gay-ing thing lol.den we plyed game,water ball n whacko,too bad i don kno hav to bring a shirt so i din ply waterball.den whacko is fun,n wtf y u all ask me to do e pole dance...den ply mafia(julia n jasmine get doctor card bt dey din save anybody lol)n i get detective card bt i din arrest anybody too.=.= for photo can view suanli's blog.gid blog as well.

tooooo bad la i don hav photo.cos i don hav my own camera den i think betta don lend my parent's wan or else dey keep nagging.bla bla bla.

hope u wont slp when read dis photoless blog.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

是我的海

苏打绿 《是我的海》


这些日子以来
突然间变成一片空白
这段日子是否
沉睡中忽然哭醒过来
太多意外
没想要勉强我感慨
太多困难
会让人害怕看未来
你知道我不想离开
你知道我有多无奈
如果时间一直走得那么快
我怎么对你依赖
是我的海
阳光的下午慢慢感染
当海不蓝
飞起的梦想都变尘埃

你知道我不想离开
你知道我有多无奈
如果时间一直走得那么快
我怎么对你依赖
你知道我不想离开
你知道我有多无奈
如果时间一直走得那么快
我怎么对你依赖
泪流出来该怎么办
是我的海
寂静的下午默默离开
海也不蓝
转过身不能再宠爱
我多想大声喊
我多不想明白
我只想唱来一些温暖
在我们心里不会腐坏


最近心情很低落。

只是,如果不是沉睡中忽然哭醒过来,
而是阖上眼眼泪就会流下,那悲伤该用怎样的词曲去诠释?

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Guitar Guitar!

ow i reali feel lyk learn guitar.told my mum last yr det i wan to learn it,she say after pmr only can.den after det i forget bout dis thing ady.den when joe told me he start to learn guitar ady n told me his dream,i ask him let me to write his song lyrics if his dream come true lol.bt nw,i reali feel lyk learn it.imagine u hav a guitar when ur all alone,dets a erm great console?gotta tell my mum abt it.bt i think shud 1 more dissapointed case.final exam is coming soon,den after final exam i feel lyk do alot of things.dota comp(which we feel lyk participate in it),try to travel alone if i can make it or try to travel wif fren if we able to break e rules of under18 CANNOT book n check in hotel(WTF!),den work if i could get a work which huiyang promise to find.argh..bt alot of ppl nvr go to music sch for guitar lesson bt dey learn it demself from e thing dey get from internet.so i hope if i cant learn it from e music sch i can learn it myself on one day.dreams nvr too late lol.

=)

Thursday, September 18, 2008

还是一样的心情



对于成长,我有太多的遗憾和无奈。或许,寂寞是很绝对的,在无法意识的自我体现中,一直蚕食着生命的阳光。又或者说,我其实不应感慨的,个人的感伤在世事中只是小片乌云。但是往回看,抓不住的事物太多,想要的生活在梦里才能实现。

所以,请给我感伤的自由,我或许会在夜里,为生命掬一把心碎,或许会在阳光里,找到自己的不存在。然后或许,一切原来都不重要,那只是呢喃的低语,是你不会去关心的破碎,又或是你睥睨低视的弱者。然后的然后,从前或许都会只是天空里的一片缺失。

又或许,这个夜里或许会有一片彩虹,在那个夕阳的林子里。还是依然无语的沉默脸庞?

还是还是,这些都只是没有意义的独白?

=)?

im down.fucking down.

如果你给我一片天,
我能许你什么?
土地的实,
还是忧愁的轻飘?



=) ? =( ?

Saturday, September 13, 2008

bla

so many days nvr write blog ady.okay im lazy n i think no ppl visit my blog.so lol.bro wedding jus passed.lol its nice,wif bro funny speech.den days jus pass as usual,sch slp game movie.exam coming ady,jus study a littleeeeeeee bit only..gonna die ady.okay so i wont tell my mum i gt exam n i hope she wont discover det i gt exam bt i think mostly she will kno den she will scold me den i will die den i will..n i think i reali hav to learn hw 2 organize n manage a blog well.my blog jus simply too dull n erm boring.lol gt alot things feel lyk write out bt jus don kno hw 2 write out.so erm it takes time? =)

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Finally


okay finally i can deal wif e blog.v pekcek la keep on set set set den end up wrong thing =.= so today sch is kinda okay.u kno wad,my class is going to chg e add maths teacher(prosably).den today did silly things n crake lame joke wif julian all e time(u pull my tie i pull ur xxxx!!).bro wedding coming soon!ow seriously im looking for it.argh im finding more 80's classic hits so i'll stop here.lol. =)

P.S:n i do not smoke okay.lol.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008


Hi so here is my blog after wanted to create it since last last year wif joe.den nw he created a wretch blog bt i stil staring at my computer or plying games instead of do a blog.n my first post ever?stil gt alot thing haven set le..gotta learn more of e blog..n today sch is boring n sky is crying n im tiring..so dets all..

P.S:n dis pic is nice. =)